I thought my days were ash, but what are days really? There was a time many moons and suns ago, when I was a different color. I was young once too you know. I’ve heard, or actually since I don’t hear, I’ve felt that I am descended from a long line, that my ancestors on these great dry plains are plentiful, some might even still be floating around. The old ones. One or two passed me by in my younger days. Those were but brief encounters. Time stands still in those times when the yearning thirst for rains and moisture are long, here within the shimmering furnace of nowhere. I am sure that had I eyes to see, I would not be fond of the view, because despite the changing seasons, there is not much change on these distant plains – I can feel it. I thought my day was up, or days. I thought my roots had reached for the last damp, or the last lick of dew to be had in this rocky outcrop, in the hard and the dry. I have let go pieces of myself – there will always be a branch to spare. I suppose I should’ve expected it, having experienced the faint wisp of a passing relative, that I one day too would be free. But now I am. I’ve caught a second wind, or second hundredth – I lost count when I was but a sapling that age ago. Now I feel many things, mostly hard. But, in lifetimes of mostly wind and dust and rain and the heavy undergrowth, a rock or several hundred are welcome acquaintances than simply floating against the bareness. I passed by some embers some time ago, can’t say how long. It could well have been some relatives of mine, giving way for another world, another time. The wind will claim them. The wind claims everything, just as it carries and rolls me along. It’s still dry here. It’s always dry here. Ancient murmurings make this to be that place called the cousin to a desert. Why, because what little growth there is – like myself – provides that glimmer of hope, where a desert has none. I have passed by some far off dwellings and some lonely living things. All are waiting, that is all anyone does here, to wait, for those clouds to bring a faint promise... We wait. I use to wait too, until I took this journey, this long journey. Who knows how long it will last or where I will go. I do know that there is no more waiting, not for me. But, I do feel like this journey, my only one of substantive distance, shall be my first, my last, and my only. For now, I tumble on… and in this vast land of nothingness but dust and thirst I am what I am. I am home, in this place without time, of dust and rock and me, where the sun is my shelter, referred to by many in a grating whisper, on an umpteenth wind as, ‘Thirstland’. --- Flash fiction by Steven Benjamin [flickr.com, mikerossi.co.za, jbaynews.files.wordpress.com, northerncape-info-directory.co.za, rainharvest.co.za, theday.co.uk, karoospace.co.za, lessonsleatlastnight.files.wordpress.com, portfoliocollection.com, themaxefiles.blogspot.com, safaribookings.com, thewildangle.com, savingwater.co.za, dressedbystyle.com] Fact: South Africa is 2nd only to Australia in the world, when it comes to the countries with the most Windmill's.
0 Comments
"Discovering the secret of a man's soul." This is NOT something that can be done by reading ONE book, but it's a journey of discovery to be traveled and learned over a lifetime. John Eldredge though, goes some way in attempting to figure out what really makes men tick, and what is at our core. Although there are inconsistencies, and he does take liberties with scripture and context, he still manages to hit the mark, going some way in setting those foundations (or re-setting them) of a real man. Synopsis What happens to our boyhood dreams "beating the bad guys... and rescuing the damsel in distress"? John Eldredge looks to highlight the plight of the modern christian man, sitting in the church pews, bored. Wild at heart invites men to rediscover the true passion at the heart of God, simultaneously inviting women to learn the true secret of a man's soul. Target All men who consider themselves real men, should read this. It's not so much about being the tough guy, but it is about discovering true masculinity. So those men who are after God's own heart, if you wish to understand yourself, and him, a bit better, this book sure helps. Bottom Line So yes, I did question some of the context of a few scriptures, which I won't go into here - the lesson there though is: whenever you hear someone, or read a quoted scripture, be sure to check the Bible to confirm the context and how that scripture is being applied, as apposed to how it is being used. That aside (it comprises just a few niggles here and there), the greater message is not lost, far from it: the message of how a christian man should go about discovering what he is made of and what is at his core. I've always known, or ever since my father taught me, that to find the purpose of a creation, one should check with the inventor, the creator... in this instance, the creation is us, and the creator - GOD. So, to find our purpose we should by rights inquire with... But there's much more to this book, which strikes at the reason's for why men have strayed from masculinity, what is required of us in the modern world. It looks at the role of our fathers and the deep set wounds we all bear. "Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" "The trajedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives." I agree with Eldredge when he says that there's something wrong with society (above and beyond all the other problems with it), that men are required less and less, what with the advent of the 'metrosexual', 'getting in touch with your feminine side' et al. not to mention the lack of honorable father figures in society. Somewhere along the line, the need for masculinity has dwindled, and we as men of God, need to reclaim it. I recommend this book for the simple reason that it has got a relevant message and that inevitably, you will glean something useful from it. Whether it's that you actually learn something new, or are reminded of a truth you already knew - there's something here for every man, christian or not - and of course, women should read it too, to gain a better understanding of your man, or the man you desire, and how you can be part of a journey of adventure... to play a crucial role in an epic story (This is not bashing the 'independent woman' - but attempts to explain why there is this complex, due to the lack of respect for women - it's all related. Note: There's another book by Eldridge and his wife Stacy called 'Captivating - Unveiling the mystery of a women's soul' which I'm currently reading). By my reckoning, if Elderedge's intent is to draw men (any and all) closer to God and aid them in realizing their purpose and living the life God wants them to lead, then despite the niggles, I believe he succeeds. This book certainly found me at the right time as it answered some questions that have been sitting on my heart! God Bless. A battle with Gravity - A return to the Wilderness, Part 2 On the way up it pulls you down with a whisper, then conversational advice, and then a scolding voice saying: 'don’t go, it’s too high, it’s too steep…' on the way down, it welcomes you, feeding your tired momentum as your brain has violent and bloody premonitions of you falling face first into the stone and gravel. Here, below, is a look at a truly grand weekend, tackling my toughest hike thus far. A great challenge it most definitely is, though the real test lies – knowing now what I went through – in going back and, having at it again. This was my first time (along with several others), but there were those in our team who were climbing this mountain for the 2nd, 3rd and even 5th time (our leader Ricky has made it a yearly pilgrimage for the last half a decade). I won’t regale you as to why we climb, why we brave freezing temperatures, or what compels us to wade through thick foliage or clamber up and over boulders on all fours… that’s for another day (or perhaps last week’s entry, but I will say that it is a deep and resolute compulsion… actually, it can be summed up in a simple way: it makes you come alive! For we were not made for offices, streets, suits and skyscrapers, we were made for the wild. It will not shout nor prance, it will appear to you as a subtle tap on the shoulder, a veritable whispered secret, in the way the sea calls to a sailor. Once you turn to answer, you'll keep going back for more... for ourselves, for closeness to God, for survival, a photo op, for passion, inspiration, or just, to escape. High Fives, slaps on the back and hugs to Lenoray, Ricky, Juwelin, Mama T, Nina, Quentin, Mike, Frank, Gavin, Nicole… and of course me. To great company, breathtaking views and sore limbs; Cheers! Till the next time... "To-morrow We Disappear Into The Unknown" "You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover is yourself." Here’s some notes for those looking to give this hike a go, here are some vital bits of info… The Hut close to the summit sleeps about 20 so if your team is not big you will probably end up sharing the facilities with several teams. You will hence have to pre-book as there’s usually a waiting list (we somehow managed to squeeze in at the perfect time). Contact Megan for further arrangements and ironing out of details [email protected] The arrangements are as follows; you’ll drive to the “base” hut/house where your cars will be driven to a more secure location in the town of Robertson – where from you’ll be shuttled back to the house (facilities include beds/mattresses, kitchen, indoor braai, hot water, toilets etc… there is electricity). You’ll climb up to the hut on day one (also with warm water, mattresses braai place, so bring your own meat). You climb down on day 2 – brace yourself, it’s a B*t*h of a down climb! Call ahead on the way down for the shuttle, so you can collect your car/s. This hike is rated as SEVERE - and it lives up to it! Direction’s: From Worcester, enter Robertson (on main road/Voortrekker) Turn Left into Paul Kruger Street (just before KFC). Continue along this road for a while. It will feel as though you’re exiting Robertson as it bears/deviates slightly to the right. Eventually you’ll come to a four-way stop (with green fields ahead and to the right) Turn left into Paddy Street. (*Apologies, I was tired and didn’t count the number of streets you’ll pass to get this far). You’ll then pass through a small suburb. Drive straight; continue past the Dagbreek Primary School, and over the speed bumps. Eventually the road will turn to gravel and will bend toward the left. The road will wind up into the hills for a kilometer or 2 until you find the Dassishoek hut on your left (it has an open sided corrugated iron carport on one side. - Go in peace - God Bless! - A Return to the Wilderness, Part 1 I write this whilst mentally planning for a hike. Hopefully this time next week I’ll be writing from the proverbial “other side” of that mountain. It doesn’t seem like much I know, like making a fuss over something hundreds, if not thousands have done before me, and more still will do after, but allow me to put things in context… For the last few years I’ve been telling people that I’ve written a book, and only one person really, beyond a shadow of a doubt can back me up on that claim, yes my family has seen snippets as well as some friends and professionals I’ve networked with, but largely, it remains a feat that for the most part people just have to take on my word. But that doesn’t say much. On this journey I’ve seemingly gone about things in my own way – backwards that is… Leon Uris wrote that to be a writer we have to acknowledge within ourselves that we’re either insane or very naïve; this I have discovered over and over again. Can I compete with the best out there? Is my work good enough (even as I work constantly to improve it)? Do people actually want to hear what I have to say? – And on that note: What exactly do I have to say that warrants such an endeavour? - These are questions every writer faces. Inevitably, I’ve also learned that we preach about what we ourselves need to learn, and that, is what I’ve been doing for the last few years (in the very least anyway), learning. Which brings me back to the mountain; I was once asked how it is that I’m such a good climber (referring in that instance to rock climbing) – truthfully I’m not that great at it, but let’s just say that I’m “contextually adept”… this was when I first started, and as a beginner my reply was: “I guess I was always a rock climber in my mind, except that physically, I just wasn’t. So then, when I eventually got the opportunity, it all sort of felt natural” – this is something I’ve been working to apply to my writing career as well, because once you actually make that huge leap, or take the first step/hold on that first climb, are you really what you claim to be, what you believe yourself to be? That is where Faith creeps into the reckoning. Needless to say we all have our personal journey and have to travel it and negotiate its challenges in our own way. The Spiritual life cannot be made suburban. It is always frontier, and we who live in it must accept and even rejoice that it remains untamed. I’ve been doing some interesting reading of late, earnestly this time (the first real reading, that wasn’t specified research of some kind, since I started writing my book), from books that have appealed to me personally (one of which I reviewed a couple of weeks back). The one I’m currently about to finish is titled ‘Wild at Heart’ about defining, seeking and understanding the true heart of a man. It’s a book every man, or anyone who calls himself one, should read. I’ll zero in on one thing though… that of the wilderness. You see, within the heart of the true man lies the desire to explore, to be the frontiersman and lay foot upon unbroken ground, to return to the wild. It’s interesting that when people do this (not just men), they inexplicably relate the experience as being something akin to spiritual, because in reality, it is our spiritual home. So if you acknowledge the spirit within a man, within yourself, then you must realize that that Spirit, is in fact wild as well. The flesh is weak and confining and finite, but the spirit is unrestricted and strong and eternal, but only if we embrace it. Take the Bible for what it is physically – a book – and in this book of stories from many writers there is a tale of when God made Adam (in the wilderness) and brought him into the Garden of Eden (where he made Eve)… the point being this: there is a reason why men often put up pictures of untamed landscapes in their house or office, and it is about way more than simply beauty. It is the CALL of the wild, beckoning him to come home, and re-energize for his daily battles. Incidentally, the Bible also states that our spirit is our direct link to God (if you take it as more than just a book of stories). (It begs the question: where does this spiritual realm come from?) Your spirit is wild, which is why so many choose to ignore it, or don’t acknowledge it at all, because it is also dangerous, but it remains the key to you coming alive. So, I’m heading up to a mountain (along with over a dozen other brave souls, male and female), into that wintery cold, clouds and snow, to in some way symbolically cap off or underscore this mini chapter in my life – which just so happens to coincide with the near completion of the third draft of my novel (which I’ve renamed Peacekeeper – about a man who discovers what it really takes to fight the battles he faces, even when he doesn’t see it coming, when he’s alone and outmatched). The true heart of man is not a mere fleshy pump in his chest, but is in, and is, his spirit and the exploration of the vast untamed mystery of this creation we like to call life. Yes, there will be splendor, but there will also be pain lurking in that dangerous unknown, this is a battle after all. I pity those who think less of it… but there is always hope. Part of it is living on the border between life and death, or living on the border between the material and immaterial, and learning how to apply that spiritual world, to the natural of everyday. Getting back to the wild then, is about getting back to the frontier for easier access into the transcendent part of ourselves which is more than elemental. For me, personally, it’s about getting closer to God. Watch This trailer in FULL Screen mode. These Guys are just as crazy - I admire them because I suck at slack-lining and I've never attempted highlining, and wish I could do those things, but I cannot, and I cannot condone this either, even though its cool! - Leave it to the Frenchies! |
[Banner illustration by Joel Kanar]
WRITING
|