“May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” – Ps 19:14 "So many men make the mistake of thinking that the woman IS the adventure. But that is where the relationship immediately goes downhill. A woman doesn't want to be the adventure, she wants to be caught up into something greater than herself." --- Extract: 'Wild at Heart' - John Eldredge. Secret thoughts on Beauty What is it about this thing? What is it that draws my gaze, my thoughts, my being? I’ve read and know that beauty nourishes, it invigorates, inspires, uplifts and sets fireworks in the imagination. Ohhh, the imagination… and this is where we’re at – or, where I'm at, You see, the imagination… Here’s an ironical thought; imagine a world where people didn’t have an imagination. Could we live in a world like that? Now take this; imagine a world without beauty. Could anyone live in this kind of world? Think of everything that is not beautiful, and feel the corners of your mind shrivel, and the depths of soul shriek in agony. Our senses cannot live without avenues such as these. We need the nourishment for this journey. But, and here’s the thing, beauty has another side. Because we’re drawn to it so, and because our soul craves it, we can at times allow it to overwhelm. And it can consume, it can consume. It happens most with artists, when they search for the meaning, the depth of it, and they delve into it, exploring something we cannot understand. The risk is raised when Love steps in. Again, for the artist, love and passion is all entwined in it. And it seems and feels pure, when all these fine elements are interwoven within. But what happens when it’s projected, or when life’s happenings and emotions become entangled. It’s why when looking at famous artists in time we so often see their loved ones dragged down by these seemingly honest pursuits. It’s where we falter. Because deep down, when all these various glorious elements like love, beauty, passion and raw emotion are explored, we find that at the core is something quite fragile. And if we really want to go there, if we really want to delve deep, we’ll find that that fragility is tied to everything in this world. It speaks to our very existence, and the world we live in. And this is where it becomes dangerous, because so often, it is unbalanced. In this broken world, beauty was always bound to be abused, tormented and wrought under the talons of depravity as men try to control or capture this illusive something. And how pure intent can get warped Pity we have to grow old Pity we have to lose our childhood innocence. Naivety can be the saving of some, and the death of others. And so, when we shoehorn ourselves into an odd quest to preserve something pure and beautiful, we have to constantly guard ourselves. Think about this; a man looks at a beautiful woman – and what does he think? What thoughts play in his mind? What are his secret thoughts, his secret desires? Sometimes its not that hard to see when witnessing their facial expressions just passing a woman on the street. A man can voyage to save something pure, but what if he were told that he was the very threat to that purity. Could he stay away Some talk of a secret thought life. If we could wear these thoughts on our bodies, what would we look like? And so, we can see how easily it is to pervert something pure… As a writer, no, never mind that, I’ve always lived inside my mind. My father said I have an overactive imagination (which was one reason why I had nightmares as a child), but as an adult, it helps me create believable fantasy, or in most cases, believable fiction, or interweaving fiction with reality. My mind is my strongest quality, and with that, potentially my greatest strength. When I explore something, driven by passion, my mind leans on the obsessive side of my personality, and here’s where the danger comes in, speaking of consuming. I’ve been told I would make a good detective, due to this very dog-with-a-bone type quality. But, the consuming comes into it when I take on pseudo problems that have no solutions, or when trying to understand and work people out. People are our currency, our inspiration for story, our subjects, and when we don’t understand them…where are we to go? And guess what? All those elements I mentioned earlier; love, passion, beauty – can all be found and explored in the brokenness and fragility of us, People. This is the crux – we’re a simple fabric made with a complex thread. It elicits ecstasy and pain all the same because all this grows from our soul. So when it feels like its deep, it’s because it is just that, it’s exactly that. People tend to undersell it, or take it for granted. That’s why sex is on the same level as shopping for shoes. Beauty or more specifically, sex (as sexiness) is used as a bartering tool to sell objects. Flesh is sold. People are sold… and whether overtly or covertly, people even sell themselves. Reverence isn’t enough, or it’s sometimes too much. When it comes to our secret thoughts, it’s invariably a question of balance. So let me end on a note of hope, instead of a hope for the best but prepare for the worst, or a ‘where did everyone go wrong’ – So, there is a way back, for me it’s through the Almighty, because if you cannot contribute-to/give/unveil/preserve/protect/nurture beauty, then at least just, Let it be. The torment in our souls is due to the lack or failure in searching for something that cannot be found in this world. If you're wondering where all this is coming from, well, we preach only that which we ourselves need to learn. As a man and as a writer, I constantly seek to understand, and when something riles at my core, it falls under my microscope, specifically and intensely. Beauty is otherworldly, but to truly appreciate it, we must focus and grow closer to the creator of that beauty, lest we fall and find ourselves settling for inferior pleasures, or idolizing earthly things. It's where it all started, with pride and betrayal in the garden of Eden, and the struggle within man continues to this day. This is simply part and parcel of my endless quest for purity, in God's eyes. "Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul" - Imam Abu Hamid al-Ghazali [Images: via pinterest.com]
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A unique creation. From what we know, there is no such thing as gender in heaven, even though all angels mentioned in the Bible are male – in heaven there is no need for different sexes because there’s no procreation. So when God made Eve he capped off his creation by delivering to the world a different side of himself, and bestowing man with the ‘mimicking’ creating ability, to bear children. Angels were made by God, and so was the first man (Adam), but every son and daughter of Adam (a son of God) thereafter would then be referred to as ‘son of man’ and ‘daughter of man’, born into this world. Procreation as we know it is unique to this world, and thence so is woman. It says a great deal doesn’t it? Man was created in God’s image, but in women he endowed some of his more intricate and complex characteristics (still in his image). He instilled more of his raw beauty. I like the description that draws from the design of a rib (when God took Adam’s rib – this is also the first wound spoken of in the Bible – and there is no mention of pain or scars; the healing was instantaneous because it was divinely imposed). It says that women are equally strong (protecting the man’s heart) and fragile/delicate – the bone will break first to protect what's on the inside - the heart. What also makes more sense is why Satan (serpent) approached Eve first - before Eve, God and Adam had spent time together. He created her last - She is God’s crowning creation. This does put a few other things into perspective as well – because just as Satan first targeted Eve, he also targeted all her daughters as well. Why is there so much gender inequality? Why are women such a prime commodity in the sex industry, or human trafficking? Since the fall of man, God’s crowning creation has found herself under increased focus from the devil. She is his number one target. In essence when analysing history in this context, its easy to see that Satan has launched a personal war on women. It's why they are wrongly referred to (by many men) as the ‘weaker’ sex and why in many cultures of the world, there seems to be this want to literally cover or ‘hide’ women from public life. Man at his worst sees women (or all people) simply as lumps of flesh to be bartered and exploited; as sub-human… to be owned, to have dominion over. Now think of a strong woman, and what she is capable of. Think of how every good man has a strong woman at his side; and If women are ‘taken down’, then men will be too. “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist” – this may be a popular movie quote (The Usual Suspects), but it remains a general quote that rings very true (Rev 12:9 – the deceiver). What many people are often guilty of (after acknowledging God) is underestimating the power of Satan and his role in this world/our lives. From this we can also surmise that the devil is indeed intelligent and cunning by his use of stealth, and this world is his playground of sin. So the prime target he chooses, is your mind… of course acknowledging his presence is a battle even in itself, but once you do, you then have to decide what to make of that knowledge, and whether or not you’re willing to engage with him (in conflict). This is a battle you cannot fight, and win, without Jesus. This is the world we live in. God created many beautiful things, gracing this world with his beauty, wrapping a different side of himself in the female form – illustrating his strength embedded in some of his softer more vulnerable and complex forms within this poem of creation called Woman. So it makes sense that Satan would take this unique creation and make it the focus of his war on mankind – to take down the crown jewel of creation - the bearer of life. Women “replaced” Lucifer, in a sense, as God’s most beautiful creation: “‘You were the seal of perfection, full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. 13 You were in Eden, the garden of God; every precious stone adorned you: carnelian, chrysolite and emerald, topaz, onyx and jasper, lapis lazuli, turquoise and beryl. Your settings and mountings were made of gold; on the day you were created they were prepared. 14 You were anointed as a guardian cherub, for so I ordained you. You were on the holy mount of God; you walked among the fiery stones. 15 You were blameless in your ways from the day you were created till wickedness was found in you. 16 Through your widespread trade you were filled with violence, and you sinned. So I drove you in disgrace from the mount of God, and I expelled you, guardian cherub, from among the fiery stones. 17 Your heart became proud on account of your beauty,” God describing Satan – it completely opposes the devil with horns and a pitch fork portrayed in the media. “…and you corrupted your wisdom because of your splendor.” [Ezekiel 28:12-16] From here we see the tussle of beauty. I’ve mentioned before on this blog that beauty is fascinating and multi dimensional – can we imagine a world without it? How it nurtures and uplifts, possesses the ability to manipulate, in good ways and bad. It beguiles and captivates and reveals another breathtaking side of God. And yet, this is only the natural world. To delve into the spiritual is indeed frightening and not something our human minds were made to comprehend – our human eyes would not be able to handle such a simple thing as the blinding light that comes from heavenly beings in all their splendour. That is why when reading the Bible – taking Ezekiel and his visions for instance, I interpret it in the sense that though he often attaches earthly symbolism to heavenly beings – wings of an eagle, the face of a man, the face of a lion… he’s simply quantifying his visions in a way that he/we could understand (as I read once, can you imagine how frightened Ezekiel was at this point). So likening his visions to animals he was simply grasping the various characteristics of what he saw. For instance the Bible has a number of different descriptions of Lucifer, but each of them merely alludes to his characteristics and the various shapes he takes on in the natural world – a serpentine-like nature, but then later Jesus describes him as a prowling and roaring Lion looking to devour (1 Peter 5). I, like any man, am fascinated by women, and started writing this in an attempt at capturing or understanding something more whilst it also extended a theme that I've have over the past weeks on this blog regarding women. Perhaps it was also inspired by something Pastor Joseph Prince mentioned in his sermon I posted on the ‘Real story of Noah’, regarding the Bible making no mention of female angels. But, as I found out, as I explored the creation of woman, it delved deeper and further back into the supernatural realm and thence returned to modern earthly times bringing things into context and perspective. I hope it enlightened you as it did me. Sometimes we already have the knowledge before us, but its simply the way we arrange it that may allow us to see something new and fresh… "There is in every true woman's heart, a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity, but which kindles up and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity." "Pleasure is to a woman what the sun is to the flower: if moderately enjoyed, it beautifies, it refreshes, and it improves; if immoderately, it withers, deteriorates, and destroys. But the duties of domestic life, exercised as they must be in retirement, and calling forth all the sensibilities of the female, are perhaps as necessary to the full development of her charms, as the shade and the shower are to the rose, confirming its beauty, and increasing its fragrance." "Daughters of the attitude that produced them, certain women will not appeal to us without the double bed in which we find peace by their side, while others, to be caressed with a more secret intention, require leaves blown by the wind, water rippling in the dark, things as light and fleeting as they are." [Image Credits: flickr.com, tumblr.com, pinterest, lecontainer.blogspot.com, 500px.com, fashiongonerogue.com, liekerromeijn.nl, republicofyou.com.au, everythingfab.com] "All is possible to woman, for woman alone may make herself impossible." Related posts: 'Captivating: Unveiling the mystery of a women's soul' - Book Review Bible - Book Review God's message to women Beauty & the Bullets, guns & war Ugly Beautiful Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's soul The accompanying piece to ‘Wild at Heart’, this time John Eldredge teams up with his wife Stasi in the writing department in pursuit of the heart of a woman, in all her feminine beauty. "Even to see her walk across the room is a liberal education." Synopsis “Every woman was once a little girl. And every little girl holds in her heart her most precious dreams. She longs to be swept up into a romance, to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure, to be the Beauty of the story. Those desires are far from child’s play. They are the secret to the feminine heart. The message of Captivating in this: Your heart matters more than anything else in all creation. - What Wild at heart did for men, Captivating will do for women. Target Primarily women, some might say Christian women, but I believe women from any culture or religion can gather something from these pages. It is also a very handy read for men too, seeking to understand their woman, or just women in general a little more. In fact, most women that have read the book, implore men to read it too, just like women should read Wild at Heart. "She knew treachery' Bottom Line Admittedly, not being the direct intended target reader of this book, meant it took me a while to find a rhythm, a while to get going and find that groove you seek when reading any book (each one has their own). However, once I got into it, making the necessary readjustment, because as a man I’m reading this primarily as a learning exercise, I could then glean what I could and in some instances recognize where certain things could be applied to my own life. These are the type of books men want to read but seldom find the energy to do so, or perhaps they start but fail to finish it, so it is a small triumph that I managed it, though I’m not cracking any champagne bottles. This book tackles the issues of beauty and strength, and varying forms of such, as well as the modern woman and how her role, and the regard for her, has changed. But its more than that. It’s a wonder when looking at all the great stories of the world, that there are so few about heroic women (compared to men), though we know that were it not for women, those men would not have been around to achieve all those accomplishments, but is that it? Is that all women are for, to bring strong and courageous men into the world? NO! Of course not, the message is rather that in every story of greatness, women played an equally crucial role. If men be the reflection of God’s strength, then women are undoubtedly the reflection of God’s unparalleled beauty, in all its complex glory. "Beauty is Dangerous" [Image credits: nbcLatino.com, flickr, russianwomentruth.com, wallsave.com, "womens-league", "asian-women-hairstyles"] In fact, so beautiful was she, that the first man, Adam, actually chose her over God; but he would discover that nothing can compare, nothing can satisfy the hunger of his soul for what God is and has… that deep spiritual yearning we all carry – no material thing can satisfy a spiritual need. The two are separate yet can be connected; in that a man and a woman in marriage become one in spirit, but God always comes first, because he's the creator of ALL, he created both man and woman, and if we are to seek our purpose in life, we must look to the creator for guidance, not other creations... A large portion of this book is aimed at marriage and the relationship between the man and woman, but focussing on how the roots take shape to form a strong bond – that is to say how women deal with their lives before entering marriage (the same goes with guys) and even how to get the best out of their husbands (for those already married). This may all seem unromantic in approach, but I assure you, reading this, and other books like it, will only highlight how romantic God really is, and how much of heaven has been imprinted on this earth. There are lessons in this book that can be learnt and re-learnt as many have claimed, and I concur, that this is a book that can be read several times. We were meant to delight in the splendour of a woman’s beauty, their allure, their intricate mysticism and complicated nature… but the world (devoid of the Spirit) would and does abuse this. Women, who are meant to be man’s equal, are subject to exploitation and depravity, where beauty is a thing to be bartered and traded. Yet, as I’ve re-learnt here; beauty is alive, it is nurturing, and it is has the ability to grow, to enlighten, enliven and invigorate. How many men have gone to war for beauty, to show off their valour, even with humble intent? How many times has your spirits been lifted at the sight of something beautiful? Beauty can soften a hardened heart and break down barriers, but it can also awaken the primal beast in men, hungry with insatiable desire. Beauty has the ability to evoke strength in those who gaze upon it, and to instil resolve and life, even if that life is simply the basic quickening of the pulse. And, you know what, we need beauty. It’s in our DNA? What would the world look like without it? What would the world be like without the enchanting presence of a woman? "Beauty overwhelms us, enchants us, fascinates us, and calls us" We, as men, are drawn to beauty, because that’s what it does, it attracts, but as men, real men, our duty is to ensure that we avail our strength (and protection) and also ensure that it is always enabled to flourish, because if not, then beauty can also wither and grow dormant. This happens far too often, but there's still hope of that beauty being rekindled to return to its passionate freedom. In Wild at heart it was said that there are two kinds of women; one who is like the Caribbean, and the other like the North Atlantic Sea… but only one of them requires a real man. Captivating attempts to awaken what’s at the heart of every woman (but in the process also educates men as to their role to play). It may take things from a Christian vantage point, even criticizing the church for stunting and suppressing the role of women, but the principles can be applied universally. I highly recommend this bestseller, whether you're man, but especially if you're a woman! 4/5 "Show me your face,let me hear your voice; For your voice is sweet and your face is lovely." You belong among the wildflowers You belong in a boat out at sea You belong with your love on your arm You belong somewhere you feel free - Tom Petty For my book review of "Wild at Heart", click HERE |
[Banner illustration by Joel Kanar]
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