Today is a rather special day in the calendar of my family and I, perhaps not for the reason we would like, but it will remain a landmark day... eight years ago we lost a father, husband, brother and son. >> My Dad, Keith Benjamin. I was planning something else for today, but events led me to this post... I've never really made this blog personal as such, apart from one or two rare posts, and I'm not about to start, but for today I'll make a concession. A couple of weeks ago it was my Birthday - and how beautiful it was, with the rain and cloud disappearing for just that day, it seemed. It was a yet another reminder of how blessed I am. I've been counting my blessings of late - being alive for one, as I was involved in what could have been a very bad car accident in pouring rain, thankfully that too is behind me, just about. The times above is when you're most acutely aware of you're own mortality, conscious of your next breath, laughing with your family - it realigns your perspective, clears away the complications, of which there are many. So today I thought I'd take stock; this past year has been both big and small for me... one 'event' that passed by without much fuss was that this, my blog, turned one year old (in mid July), but more important than that milestone, is the journey I've been on in the interim. It's a strange thing, the spirit; to say that my spirit has grown so much in the past year can mean many great things, and yet for some, can mean absolutely nothing at all. You see, the world doesn't measure greatness, or success or even development by that thing called your spirit... It really is a strange thing, both ancient, and alien to us; for those who acknowledge it anyway. It's kind of like undertaking a long arduous journey, requiring great mental and physical fortitude (as I did along with some friends earlier this year, and last year as well). At the end of it though, what are you left with aside from memories? There is no material pay-off, only your mind feels enriched, your muscles feel weaker (for a little while immediately afterwards anyway) before healing. You may even feel older, or maybe just downright tired. And yet, the investment is there, in the spirit also. And so I'll say this - this past year has been big for me personally, and the next one will be even greater. To achieve the biggest arc and the highest heights, one must pull back the arrow the full length, till only the arrowhead remains in front of the bow - when the tension is at its greatest - and with it, its potential... I've been on a deep spiritual journey, discovering what it really takes to be a man - that journey is an on going affair, and its essential, especially considering the timing of it. My tree may not be bearing much fruit right now, but I assure you it will - as is always the case when leading a spirit led life. To everyone who has read this blog, commented and liked etc, I thank you. To all my friends, both personal and professional, you support has been invaluable. Thank you to my family for your endless support, without you I'd be living on the streets right, if not for the grace of God, and to wit, my biggest thank you of to my Lord and saviour, without you, I wouldn't be living at all. Lastly, I'd like to congratulate my friend for finding the woman of his heart. Wishing Vaughan and Monique all God's richest blessings. The wedding was beautiful - may it set the tone for your future, and may you strive to reflect God's love for one another. Much Love, dear friends! Steven To all married couples: "earthly marital unions were established by God to be a type and shadow of the greater marriage between God and man"
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I recommend this book to you as it was recommended to me, and then the same guy (Shout-out to Jonathan Strysko) who did the recommending, then gave me the book a few days later just before attending another friend's wedding. In a way, it kind of found me at just the right moment (not between weddings, but in my writing). This also happens to be the first book I've actually read from start to finish in quite a while. I've started a few novels but haven't gotten round to finishing them (one by Roald Dahl - for those tracking me on Goodreads) - this is what happens when you read for the sake of reading, as apposed to reading what you need or really want to read in that moment (one novel I started but haven't finished, is the latest in the Myron Bolitar crime series 'Live Wire' by Harlen Coben - and that was a book I was looking forward to , but somehow, my heart and mind was in search of something else - although I will definitely get back to savoring that one - and then, out of nowhere, came this book by Donald Miller, an author I admittedly didn't know much about). I've never done a review for a book before so I'll hijack the format we use at In The Kan for films (its more fun that way); to read it, just click the read more tab at the bottom of this post (I only display what I think people actually want to see - and I for one, am not a fan of reading book reviews, I'm more of an impulsive and instinctual reader, whatever that is...) so let me rather add Miller's Author's Note which got me (recommendations and gifts by friends aside) intrigued enough to turn the page. Author's Note: (A Million miles in a Thousand Years) If you watched a movie about a guy who wanted a Volvo and worked for years to get it, you wouldn't cry at the end when he drove off the lot, testing the windshield wipers. You wouldn't tell your friends you saw a beautiful movie or go home and put a record on to think about the movie you'd seen.The truth is, you wouldn't remember that movie a week later, except you'd feel robbed and want your money back. Nobody cries at the end of movie about a guy who wants a Volvo. So, here's why this book appealed to me . You see, within this journey of writing a book, I've learned quite a lot and, as I've said to many folks, "I wrote a book, and then, during the process of editing and rewriting, I learned how to actually write a book". There are actually courses and textbooks to creative writing and story construction (one course is even mentioned in A Million miles) that I didn't know about, so effectively I skipped all the boring stuff about developing plot and subplot and constructing a protagonist etc... most of that came naturally (although I did need some refining), what I really needed to learn, was why I wrote this book in the first place, and how I can now make it better. I wont go too far into the details, but suffice is to say that after writing my first manuscript, I, like so many others who have done so, thought I was THE BOMB... as it turned out, my boom wasn't that spectacular (more of a PUFF really, I mean I knew it was only a first draft, but it was my first, first draft, EVER - and for a moment there, I could kind of live in that spotlight that only I could see). And then I learned that that was actually normal. It has been said by someone famous, that a 1st draft is simply a blank formless lump of clay, and that from then on, the writer chips and chisels away with subsequent drafts and rewrites to reveal the actual story, buried in there somewhere. And, it's been within this stage where the REAL questions started to come up, about my story, my main character and his conflict, his life and those around him... and by extension, those questions sort of crept up on me and my life, and this career of writing I've chosen, one that hasn't produced much as of yet, that anyone can see anyway... So yeah, in this journey I've needed, and received, many nudges in the right direction, from professionals, professors, journalists and perfect strangers (some of whom have become friends).
It's been frustrating, but I anticipate, as I near the completion of my 3rd (and a half) draft, that when this book (prior to all the others I will write, and after I acquire a Literary Agent)) eventually gets published that the main sensation I'll feel, the one that will be most prevalent, is Relief! My first post back, and I must say there really is such a thing as "car-lag", the car version of jetlag... Anyway here's something random I wrote whilst on my travels with family and friends, along with some of what I've seen recently: Just like a drop of water or small splinter overwhelms an ant, so could one equate life defining events we experience and later describe as “pivotal” in our lives… it thusly inspired one grey haired man to exclaim, with pointed finger, “It’s all relative”. When you think back on your life you may well recognize several or more “way-points” which greatly influenced the evolution of you. Some of those points will be bright with achievement, or dark with sorrow or failure even, but the ones in between are a little more subtle - in and amongst all the boring bits. They come and go and sometimes pass us by due to untimely distraction or stubbornness on our part, when we’re so set in our ways. They may be shocking and surprising; the modern day ‘intervention’ coming to mind, or they may come in the form of a soft whisper, if we’re attentive enough to lend a spiritual ear. To some who are willing to see, to look past the obvious, morsels of treasure could well be found. In great detective stories they talk about ‘knowing what to look for’ – and the same could be said in the case of ‘life moments’ or just life in general… if you’re in that place where you’re either looking for change, affirmation of something or a blunt tap to steer you in the right direction. If you’re looking for it, whatever it may be, you’ll see it, nestling within simple conversation, or the words unspoken. Sometimes, it’s an event itself – maybe not even happening to you, perhaps you’re only an observer, learning from the lessons of others… As a writer, it’s easy to observe, but getting involved and allowing myself to be moved by the things I see and people I meet are essential, fundamental. Our evolution and growth depend on it. It doesn’t always come easily, because sometimes we can be too settled, distracted, or maybe we’re afraid of change or comfortable in our ways that we just tend to get in our own way… Anyway, a great story inevitably surrounds a great character (insert yourself here), overcoming, achieving, and most of all, living. You may not always get what you want, but in becoming the best character, you must first overcome... to be forged. Special Mention: Also: Congrats to Tebs and Bontle... simply beautiful! Yes people, this was a two wedding hit and run trip! (*All pics in this post taken by me... - And I thank you!*) |
[Banner illustration by Joel Kanar]
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